Some California couples might find themselves at a point in their relationship where they question if the marriage should survive. The answer is not always clear, but there is a process they can follow to decide how to proceed and seek a divorce.
The length of the marriage often has an impact
Couples who have been married for a long time often have a lot more invested in making the marriage work than those who are still in a relatively shorter marriage. The longer the marriage, the higher the probability that the couple are parents and that they have accrued a variety of joint assets, including the family home, investment properties or accounts and even a joint business. Their lives are so intertwined, that the idea of starting over after the end of their marriage might seem too daunting.
Asking the right questions might help with decision-making
Deciding to seek a divorce often means doing a deep reflection about your relationship, facing the harsh realities and stepping away from the fantasies. Some of the questions someone going through this process should ask themselves include:
- Are they happy and satisfied with their life?
- Have they and their spouse grown apart and lost their intimacy, both physically and emotionally?
- Can they forgive their spouse’s faults and weaknesses to move forward in the relationship?
- Have they grown indifferent towards their spouse or has their spouse grown indifferent towards them?
- Do they have any hope for the future with their spouse?
- Have they dealt with issues such as substance abuse, infidelity or abuse in their relationship?
Making the actual decision on whether to continue working on the marriage or getting the divorce can provide some relief from the emotional intensity of being unsure. Once the questions are answered and the decision is made, you can focus on your physical and emotional health and prepare for the next step.